Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Safe to publish now...


I have a secret. Well, I had it for a couple hours. Then I just had to tell someone. And who else would I tell than the person for who's wedding I'm supposed to getting fitted for a bridesmaid dress next week? I sent her a text message saying I'd be bringing a watermelon to my fitting next week, because that's the size I'd be at her wedding.

Yep, found out tonight I'm pregnant. Again. And yes, my baby girl is only 3 1/2 months old. If I'm figuring it out right, she'll be about 3 weeks shy of turning 1 when this little one makes his/her appearance at 39 weeks.

Wow.

Yeah, we wanted kids close. And I said I'd be fine if I was pregnant at my 6 week post-partum check-up. And I was somewhat disappointed with every negative pregnancy test I've had in the last 2 months.

But, yeah. Wow.

Here's how things change for the second child. First child, you do a pregnancy test. It's positive. You do another. It's positive too. You do a third. It's positive. And only then do you call the doctor. Second child, you do a pregnancy test. It's positive. And you don't do anymore because your first child is asleep in the swing and you don't dare wake her up to run to the store to get another one.

So here's the story of our little Christmas baby. (Kelly was our New Year's baby, this one is our Christmas baby. I promise, we do it more than just Christmas and New Years!)

I've felt like crap the last couple weeks. The stomach bug (maybe) a couple weeks ago, the feeling like I was going to start a period that went on for a week and a half. I've been extra moody and anxious, and didn't want Ethan to touch me yesterday. I thought the last few days I was getting sick, and today I just felt blah and crampy. I was either burning up or freezing. On the way home I finally decided I was going to call the triage nurse at my OB office in the morning to see if the cramps and irregular periods were normal for almost 4 months post-partum. I figured they were, but since a friend just had a D&C after the birth of her child because not everything came out like it should have, I supposed it'd be best to check things out. I told myself, it feels like I'm pregnant, with the cramps and funky bleeding and moodiness and all, but I know I'm not. I had just done a pregnancy test 8 days ago. 8. Days. Ago. Negative. Got that?

So I got home, unloaded everything in the pouring down rain, let the doggies out, changed Ladybug who had poop running down to her socks, and then put her in the swing. Then mommy got to go to the bathroom. Right before I went in, I, simply on a whim, got the spare pregnancy test out of the bag I'd brought in from the car I'd cleaned out yesterday. I knew I wasn't pregnant, and why I did a test I don't know. I just decided, purely on a whim, to do one. Just to make sure so I could tell the nurse tomorrow I definitely wasn't pregnant.

So I did my thing. Set it on the edge of the tub. Watched the moisture make its way across the little round hole. And thought I saw the edge of a blue line forming. I shook my head and said to myself that it was just wishful thinking. It was negative just last week. It's still negative. So I finished up my business and glanced back over at the test. Um. Yeah. That's a line. A very clear, very bright blue line. In the hole that's supposed to be blank. The hole that had NOTHING in it last week. Negative. 8 days ago.

I picked it up. Like Juno, I tried shaking it. Nope. In every light, every direction, that little line was there. Which meant, there was a little sesame seed inside me. And in 8-9 months, it'll be a lot bigger than a sesame seed.

Holy cow.

So, I went to cafepress.com and found a 3-6 months onesie that says "I'm the big sister." And I ordered it. I have a plan for how to tell Ethan that involves him changing a diaper. If I can keep my big mouth shut, unlike last time. I'd love to wait till Valentine's Day and tell him while we're on our weekend away, but I don't think there's anyway I can make it that long.

Now to make sure I hit "save now" and not publish!!!

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